shaktigardens homepage shaktigardens homepage links FAQ About Don Therapies offered workshops offered
shaktigardens.com news and events

shaktigardens is a venue in Johannesburg South Africa with events and therapies to honour and encourage the Goddess in all women.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Letting go of the past

In my years of being involved in alternative healing I have come across many strange incidents and have some fun stories to tell. I do understand that some women are shy and prefer to have a woman massage them, guys just like having a pretty young lady massage them anyway. Sometimes I have had women say to me they cannot see me because their husbands are jealous. Ok, fair enough, but when a man says to me he cannot see because his wife is jealous, then I am stumped.

Coming from a Christian background I have found that many people I have known do have issues with their bodies, or with their sensuality and sexuality. There is the perception that sex is a sin, well, I believe if you abuse your sexuality or sensuality then it is a sin, but withyour loved one, there is no sin. It is an expression of divine love, simply because this is a divine gift. It is a gift from God, treasure it. This does not mean you flaunt your body by wearing revealing clothes, this does not mean you have a licence to become promiscuous. We need to be in touch with our own desires, needs and wants, learn to control them when necessary, enjoy them in the right circumstances.

If you are married you might have noticed a waning of passion and desire. This is a common problem today, modern day stress is killing libido and causing rifts in relationships. You need to get in touch with yourself first, then to explore new sensations with your partner - learn to get pleasure from giving pleasure. Foreplay and sex with your loved one is not a sin, enjoy it, this is what God has given you, He has blessed you with unique talents, talents that no other person has. You have a unique way of touching your loved one and they will tell you what they enjoy most. Communication is an important factor here, too many do not say what they want or enjoy.

How often do you switch off the lights when you want to be intimate? You have nothing to be ashamed of, in God's sight you are a perfect creation, your partner or loved one accepts you for who you are. There are some wonderful acknowledgement excercises you can do to re-develop your self esteem. You can do them by yourself or have your loved one with you when doing them, you can even exchange acknowledgements with your loved one and this helps with the communication aspect of the relationship. It also teaches honesty.

Massage can be a wonderful part of foreplay, you can learn to ease tension, then slowly begin to tease and arouse your loved one, just give them pleasure, and see how you feel afterwards. Allow yourself to relax, and drift away during a soft sensual massage done by your loved one, let them admire your body and explore it. Forget the past, it is done, move on forward to new exciting adventures, seek out workshops together, or just plan a simple outing. Your bedromm should be your "Sensual Sanctuary" or your "Pleasure Garden", it is your safe haven for romance.

Once you embark on a journey like this, you will learn to let go of the past and silly notions that your mother or aunty passed on to you - things like "shut your eyes and think of England!". Maybe you heard the joke about Aussie foreplay - "brace y'self Sheila here I come!". It does not have to be like this, you are on a journey, exploring your sensual nature, learning to give without expecting reward, to give of yourself without reservation, to enjoy what orgasms can do for you.

You will experience a lot of these teachings in my couples massage workshops and in sensual healing. In private sessions I work on the body's energy points to bring about harmony, this is combined with Hot Stone Therapy and Swedish Massage to allow the energies to flow freely through the body, removing blockages and allowing you to experience new sensations. Then there is the aspect of physical self love. If you do not know your body, or how it will react to certain pleasures, how can yuo communicate this to your loved one. Take time, look at yourself closely in the mirror, see what happens to your skin when you gently stroke it, or even your nipple, arouse yourself and feel the pleasure, now convey these thoughts and emotions to your loved one, telling them exactly what you need and want in foreplay.

Enjoy the journey, explore, celebrate yourself as a unique creation with it's own set of desires needs and wants

Be blessed within yourself
Don